We all know how important our names are. They give us a sense of personal identity. Have you heard about the fifteen year old girl from Iceland without a name? I didn’t know this, but the small island nation in the North Atlantic has what’s called a “Personal Names Register,” that regulates what you can call your children.
The girl is suing the Icelandic state for the right to legally use the name Blaer, given to her by her mother, Bjork Eidsdottir. The problem? Blaer, which means “light breeze” in Icelandic, is not on a list approved by the government. Her full given name is Blaer Bjarkardottir, but now she is known only as “Stulka,” which means girl. Maybe she should give in to all the political correctness, and officially change her name to Gudrun. It is not only approved by the government, but is a very popular female Icelandic name. I’m not sure, but I think it translates to “loud fart.” The man who runs the committee to regulate names is, “Agusta thorbersdottir.” Wow, the guy’s named after a golf course in Georgia, and what sounds like a Viking god’s daughter, for heaven’s sake. He should be more worried about his own name, then some poor young lady’s.
To be fair, I understand what Iceland’s trying to do. They want to try to keep children from being embarrassed by having a strange name. In America, many celebrities give their children weird names. I’m sure Gwyneth Paltrow’s two kids, “Apple” and “Moses,” or Bob Geldof’s daughter, “Fifi Trixibelle,” face some good-natured teasing from their classmates. On the bright side, I heard Frank Zappa’s children, “Moon Unit” and “Dweezil” grew up just fine. Oh, by the way. The name “Elvis” is on the approved list of names for males in Iceland. Do me a favor. If any of you ever visit Iceland, and you meet a boy named “Elvis Thekingdagundsdottir; could you tell me if he was wearing a bag over his head.